I want to talk about an unpopular, but very important topic---the trap of comparisons.
It’s a game that needs no teacher. I see kids start as early as K-5 comparing sneakers or hula-hoop colors at school. And as we get older, the objects may change (vacations, houses, relationships, bodies), but the root remains the same--discontentment.
Since the majority of content I share in this space centers around travel, fitness and food I’ll start there. Blogging, instagram, facebook profiles are a highlight reel of our lives, not a live feed. There isn’t an audience for posts or pictures of me folding workout clothes (although I spend plenty of time doing it). Nobody REALLY needs to see the day of the trip that we tried to rent beach cruisers to bike Big Sur and had to hike 1 mile with our bikes because we didn’t know about electric bike rentals (NOT glamorous, plenty of frustration). But life happens in between the pictures and posts and it’s real and raw. I doubt anybody notices, but there are a LOT of Friday and Saturday nights that we opt to eat in or meet up with friends after the movie to save for these trips--is it interesting? Not really.
The biggest fear I have is that in some way, this blog with intentions of gentle nudges and information might turn into a frustration for some readers. Whatever point you find yourself---post-baby, working mom, busy highschooler, or planning retirement, there is something you could do a little better, but not EVERYTHING. Give yourself time to reach your goals and grace when it takes a little longer…and never think you’re the only one.
The lives and futures of my younger sisters and the middle-schoolers I teach (yep, I know you guys follow my Instagram) are too important for this not to be clear:
How is Aimee so tall?!
1. Your Identity is Not Your External Appearance
In a visual world, this is easy to say, and hard to believe. How boring would it be if our only distinctions were outward. We are women (and men) with real passions, knowledge, experiences and those are what make us so more interesting than just our ‘shells.’ I believe God has given you an image that is completely unique, so don’t compare yours to another!
One of my most joyful friends---her strengths are completely different from mine!
2. Results are Not Always Physical
Nobody SEES an endorphin (those wonderful feelings you get after accomplishing something difficult). Nobody SEES lower blood pressure (maybe your doctor with a fancy tool). Nobody SEES the enhanced clarity from a morning sweat or a healthy breakfast. Those results are just as real as a dropped pound or defined abs---celebrate them!
3. There is Victory Before Arrival
That’s right--you’re probably never going to arrive at the final destination in your fitness journey. Yet there is character being developed during each new change that you make or habit your create. You are becoming a more disciplined person each time you choose to do something that is difficult, uncomfortable or inconvenient.
So next time you are faced with the opportunity to compare something in your life to another’s, remember that you aren’t seeing the throws of life. You aren’t smelling the dirty laundry, just seeing the mountain top vacation. You aren’t seeing the 5k that person couldn't finish in order to get to the marathon they did.
