"Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast.....LOVE IS NOT SELF-SEEKING" 1 Corinthians 13:4-5
One of my biggest concerns with becoming more involved in social media has been that I would start to care what people think of me more than I should--- so far, I still don't care ;) and with God's grace and Drew's very level head, I intent to continue not caring. haha.
The “Self-Love” topic is one I never thought about until I got more involved with social media. I was not raised hearing my parents tell me to “love yourself, Madeline, because if you don’t....you can’t expect anyone else to.” They told me every day that they loved me. My parents showed me (and continue to) that I was loved with their provisions, their time, their correction, and everything else that I took for granted as they selflessly invested in my siblings and me. But honestly, nobody had to teach me about loving or prioritizing myself, that comes as naturally as my desire to eat (no problem there).
As a teacher, I see Kindergarteners all the way through 5th graders who need constant reminders of how to honor and prefer (and not smack) others, but very rarely do I have to go out of my way to remind a child to look out for good old number 1. They are experts at that. And I’m not trying to downplay the importance of investing in ourselves, but is it really something that we need a constant reminder to do? Maybe. Maybe not.
Before I start sounding as though I have this all figured out, and that I constantly lay down my desires for the good of others….let me just set the record straight. I’m very intentional about investing in myself (usually the “health” side of things). Drew can attest that I get a little “put-out” (aka cranky) if things disrupt my time at the gym or exercising. I have erred on the side of rude or ungrateful more times than I would like to acknowledge regarding restaurants or meals that don’t serve me well. In fact, sometimes I even get overwhelmed with questions that people come to me with concerning their health even though this is something I love to be involved with! All these examples are MY OWN and I acknowledge that each one is rooted in my natural disposition to love myself and my comfort and my routine more than others. So I can’t help but cringe a little at the campaigns that are devoted to encouraging this love of self even at the expense of helping others. Surely there is a middle ground between us walking around unkempt, unshowered and exhausted because all we do is jump at the next opportunity to spread ourselves thin to the point of a mental breakdown and loving ourselves with every paycheck, girls night and personal training class we can squeeze.
I hope there is, and I hope we can find it because to live in a world that undervalues service and sacrifice is one in which I would rather not raise my kids. Even if it isn’t my FIRST inclination (I assure you, it’s not), I always find more joy in giving than receiving once I get past the initial discomfort. So my encouragement is not to stop exercising because it’s selfish to ask your husband to watch them for that hour, it’s not to stop getting your nails done or treat yourself to things here and there or feel guilty when you do. In fact, I think that taking SOME time to prioritize your health and personal needs can allow you to do some of these things sacrificial things even more effectively (I'm talking to all the amazing Moms out there).
My encouragement is to be discerning in the messages that are constantly bombarding our thinking through social media, entertainment and every other fire hose from which we are drinking. I choose to remind myself that the Author of love has this to say about it, even if it is a different tune than most of the “influencers” of today: